


For the Birds! (A Luckyblog Exclusive)

by scapegoat



Series: "Intros Into Arcane/Occult" with Alya Césaire & The Luckyblog [5]
Category: Miraculous Ladybug
Genre: Akuma Attack, Alya Césaire Is The Best, Alya Césaire to the Rescue, Black Cat Marinette Dupain-Cheng, Journalist Alya Césaire, Ladybug Kagami Tsurugi, Pigeons, Secret Identity, Teamwork, The Ladyblog (Miraculous Ladybug)
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-30
Updated: 2020-09-30
Packaged: 2021-03-08 01:40:20
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,376
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26727568
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/scapegoat/pseuds/scapegoat
Summary: Alya gets her first official video for the newly created Luckyblog when she helps (she actually helps!) Lady Luck and Karma take on Monsieur Pigeon. Yeah... it’s definitely a weird one.
Relationships: Alya Césaire & Marinette Dupain-Cheng & Kagami Tsurugi
Series: "Intros Into Arcane/Occult" with Alya Césaire & The Luckyblog [5]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1852921
Kudos: 14





	For the Birds! (A Luckyblog Exclusive)

**Author's Note:**

> Disclaimer: I do not own Miraculous Ladybug nor do I make money from writing
> 
> A/N: Right. This takes place almost directly after Up All Night To Get Lucky(blogged, that is)

_Sun, Sep 6 th, 2020_

  
Alya yawns as she walks down the street. She giddily checked _The Luckyblog_ as soon as she got up and did a little jig. Ella and Etta looked at her like she lost it but she didn’t care. Superheroes were her passion. Her family already knew that.

  
Her parents were both proud of her and worried for her.

  
After showering and washing her hair, Alya hit the city looking for news. (In all actuality, she was looking for art supplies to give Nathaniel so she could commission him for some artwork of the heroes.) _But_... there’s no point in having a blog about heroes if you have next to nothing posted about them.

  
Maybe she’ll get lucky and catch a glimpse of Lady Luck or Karma!

  
Before she could step inside the bookstore, she sees a man sitting in front of the shop’s display sobbing. “Whoa. Are you alright, man?”

  
The man looks up at her with tears in his eyes. “I’m the furthest thing from alright!” He wails then pauses. “B-But, no, I—sorry. That was beneath me. I shouldn’t’ve snapped at you. I’m not alright but thank you for asking.” Alya nods slowly then grabs the door handle. “The mayor— _The mayor_ —” He hisses and Alya turns back to him, letting go of the handle. “This is all the mayor’s fault! He had his lackey ban me from the courthouse. I won’t be able to feed the pigeons that congregate there.” Alya blinks at the man. “The mayor...” The man glowers, “he does nothing about the pollution or crime in the city yet can smugly lecture me on not doing my part when all I want is to feed the lovely birds. The steps are so filled with garbage that I clean them. I-If I’m not _t_ _here_ —” He puts his hands to his cheeks. “What if they eat discarded garbage? They can get sick—!” He gasps, “or worse!”

  
Alya looks around, “uh...”

  
The man abruptly stands, startling her. “Ban or no ban, I must go to them! If I don’t who will? That’s it, I’m going! I _must_ —! _For the birds_!”

  
Before Alya can open her mouth, an akuma flies into the man’s bowler hat. “Aw hell...” She mutters taking out her phone then taking a few steps back away from the man.

  
She actually manages to capture the transformation in real time. A purple almost boiling ooze engulfs the man’s entire body. When the ooze melts away the man... well... the man is a giant pigeon. Or – to be more accurate – the man is wearing a giant pigeon _suit_ that has his face free. _Though_ he does have a beak. For some reason. “I am Monsieur Pigeon!” He squawks and Alya winces. “Come to me, my animal friends.”

  
Alya hears screams then repositions her phone to see a flock of pigeons in the sky rapidly approaching the man. Alya takes several more steps back as the pigeons grab the man with their talons then carry him away. “I’ve just about seen everything now.” She mutters, lowering the phone.

  
🐤

  
The man – the _pigeon man_ – mentioned the courthouse so that’s where Alya headed. (Fortunately, it wasn’t too far from her previous location.) She has her phone out, recording as Monsieur Pigeon’s pigeon army holding a man in a police uniform with pigeons are pecking his head and chest.

  
Karma and Lady Luck drop down near the top steps of the courthouse with their weapons at the ready then they almost immediately lower them. The duo actually _laugh_ at the scene before them. “What the hell are we looking at?”  
  


“A pigeon punching bag?”

  
“More like a pecking bag.”

  
“I think they’re mistaking him for a piñata.” Karma loudly busts out laughing.

  
“Lady Luck and Karma.” Monsieur Pigeon sneers turning to them. “That is what you are calling yourselves, isn’t it? _No one_ will stop me from protecting the pigeons!” He screams. Monsieur Pigeon extends his arms and the pigeons fly down to the courthouse and carry him away.

  
“Oh no you don’t.” Lady Luck swings her yo-yo overhead like a lasso grabbing Monsieur Pigeon’s left foot with the yo-yo string.

  
“Release me at once, you repugnant insect! Don’t you know what pigeons do to ladybugs?”

  
“Yeah but what about what cats do to pigeons?” Karma punches her right hand with her left fist.

  
Monsieur Pigeon’s eyes widen, “y-you wouldn’t dare!”

  
“Then don’t threaten my partner.” Karma hisses and the pigeons all stiffen looking in her direction. She puts one hand on the ground then drops to one knee. Pupils slitting.

  
“O-Oh no! Okay, okay! Please don’t hurt my babies! I surrender!”

  
(At the middle of the courthouse staircase, Alya puts her free hand to her head.)

  
Monsieur Pigeon lowers his hands and the pigeons release him then he falls to the ground in front of the courthouse then they fly away. Lady Luck and Karma hover over him – just staring. Alya runs up the stairs and gets a closer look at the akuma.

  
“Oh. It’s you again. Hello.” Karma greets.

  
“Yup. It’s me. Hello. Huge fan, by the way. The akuma is... his feather head thing.”

  
Before Lady Luck can reach Monsieur Pigeon’s head the mask outline appears over his eyes. “The pigeons. I must protect the pigeons!”

  
“Lady Luck!” Karma screams tapping her partner.

  
The ladybug hero looks up at the flock of pigeons – twice the size of the previous one – rapidly start flying toward them. Alya gapes as she tilts her phone upward. Lady Luck releases Monsieur Pigeon’s leg then grabs Alya by the waist and they jump back off the staircase before the pigeons descend and grab Monsieur Pigeon.

  
“Quickly, to the mayor’s office!” He cackles as the pigeons carry him away.

  
“I’m guessing Mme. Mite wasn’t finished just yet.” Karma rubs the back of her neck, “I guess we’re heading to the mayor’s office.”

  
“Take me with you?” They both turn to Alya, “I can help. Plus, I’m gonna go anyway to record so you might as well keep me close.”

  
“If you get in the way or become a liability—”

  
“I won’t! I swear.” Lady Luck eyes her, “I didn’t get in the way last time. All I wanna do is record. Someone needs to show the city how badass you two are and I’ve taken it upon myself to be that someone.”

  
“That’s brave of you—”

  
“We shouldn’t be encouraging this.”

  
“We shouldn’t be _dis_ couraging her either. Because if we tell her to get lost she’ll do it anyway but just be more reckless about it. At least if we know she’s there we can keep an eye on her and she’ll be more careful.”

  
“Don’t you think keeping an eye on her will hinder us?”

  
“Nope.” Karma takes Alya by the waist, and out of Lady Luck’s grip. “I think having an extra pair of eyes will help. You’re with me, Mademoiselle. Hold on.” Giddily, the orange-haired teen complies. “C’mon Double L we got a pigeon to catch. And I guess we gotta de-akuma the bird guy.”

  
“Wait—” Lady Luck’s eyes widen, “oh... _ah_. I get it.”

  
🐤

  
When they reach the mayor’s office, Alya zooms the camera in on the mayor who has his hands and feet bound together and he’s positioned just like a pigeon and there are feathers stuffed in his mouth. “I get tying him up, but why the feathers?” Lady Luck asks.

  
“Maybe to shut him up.” Karma punches the mayor in the stomach and he coughs out the feathers.

  
“ _You_ —Couldn’t you have found a less violent way to do that?!”

  
“I could’ve slapped you in the face or kicked you between your legs.”

  
The mayor glares at her. “Where did... I’m sorry. What is he called?”

  
“Monsieur Pigeon.” Alya supplies.

  
“Thanks. Wait—” Lady Luck shakes her head, “I’m...” She takes a deep breath, “forget it. Where’s the giant pigeon man?”

  
The mayor coughs out the last of the feathers from his mouth. “On the roof! He must have every pigeon in the city with him! Those disgusting birds! And he put their _feathers_ in my mouth!? I should outlaw birds in the city!”

  
Karma walks over to him forcibly closing his mouth, “do us all a favor and shut up unless you can say something of use.” He glares at Karma again.

  
“Monsieur Pigeon said the mayor is to blame.” The heroes look over at Alya, “I was there when he got possessed. He said ‘the mayor and his lackey’ banned him from the courthouse where he was feeding the pigeons.”

  
“But if he got the mayor... why is he on the roof?” Lady Luck asks. “And who is his ‘lackey?’” Alya shrugs.

  
The mayor starts mumbling, trying to talk and Karma rolls her eyes with a sigh releasing his mouth. “This better be good.”

  
“ _I’m_ being blamed for asking a citizen to uphold the law?! I’m the mayor! It’s my job! That pigeon happy freak was inviting those winged rats to my—to **my** —” His eyes widen, “oh no! He’s going to my hotel!”

  
“What the hell are you talking about?” Alya asks, lowering the phone.  
  


“My hotel! Those... _things_ flying over my precious hotel?! Do I have to spell it out for you?”

  
“Every pigeon in the city—” Lady Luck begins.

  
“—Lead by a pigeon _man_ hellbent on revenge against the mayor—” Karma continues.

  
“—Flying over the mayor’s prized hotel.” Alya finishes.

  
The three of them glance at him and shake their heads with a shrug. The Mayor growls, “am I really considering putting the city’s defense against this sort of insanity in _your_ hands?! He’s going to have those disgusting feathered monsters shit all over my beautiful hotel! What if Chloé is sunbathing? What if my maman is in town!? _What if Audrey is back_!?”

  
“Sucks to be you.” Karma pats him on the head and he falls on his side. “Oops. You know I kinda just have to wonder if the pigeon _man_ tied him up or if the pigeons did?”

  
“That is an excellent question.” Alya says. “It would be hella impressive if the pigeons did it or if they all did it together.” Karma nods with a hum.

  
Lady Luck grabs the mayor by the head setting him back on his knees. “Listen to me very carefully.” The mayor gulps with a nod. “Whatever bullshit ‘law’ you created to drive Monsieur Pigeon to this state you are going to revoke. Immediately. We are not de-akuma-ing him for your sake but for his. And if I find out you renege on this law, and he gets re-akuma’d because of it. Pigeons will not be the only thing you will need to seek shelter from. I will hunt you for sport. Understood?” The mayor nods furiously, sweating profusely. Releasing him, Lady Luck turns to Alya. “Mlle. Recorder, I need info on the hotel please.”

  
Alya nearly squeals in joy. “It’s called Le Grand Paris. You guys were there the other day.”

  
Lady Luck sighs. “Let’s head over there then. You’re sticking near me this time.” Alya nods.

  
“Wait!” The three of them turn to the mayor who shrinks in on himself, “w-what about me?”

  
Lady Luck grabs him with the yo-yo string, pulling him forward. “You’re right. You’re going to need to apologize to the pigeon man in person.”

  
“I got him. Just a heads up.” Karma begins cheerfully as she hauls the mayor over her shoulder, “ladybugs are natural predators.”

  
“They are?!” Alya gasps, “cool! I definitely gotta add that to the blog.”

  
🐤

  
 _“Papa_!” Chloé screams as pigeons carry her away.

  
“ **Chloé**!” The mayor screams. “Why are you just standing there!? Go after my daughter!”

  
“One thing at a time.” Lady Luck says as Karma drops him. “Monsieur Pigeon, you are not in the wrong here.” Lady Luck nudges the mayor with her foot.

  
“Hm? O-Oh yes.” Balling up his fists, because these brats still have him trussed up like a roast and he’s being recorded, he sighs looking up at the _pigeon man of all things_ floating in the air above his balcony _where he just had his feathery minions carry away his only child_! “I-I _apologize_ for my behavior. But if you fed the pigeons in a less popular area with human foot traffic, there wouldn’t be an issue. People come first, Monsieur Pigeon!”

  
“That’s where you’re wrong. _People_ are what ruin this beautiful city! But no more! It’ll belong to me and the pigeons!”

  
“N-No, no, no! I-I’m going to revoke the law I just passed. I care about the pigeons! I _love_ the pigeons! I-I’m simply looking out for them! If you feed them in places with lots of people, their food or even the pigeons themselves might get stepped on! The park! That’s the perfect place to feed them. I’ll even have the police chief designate a section of the park for pigeons only! L-Like how there’s that spot for bird-watching.”  
  


“You had that same police chief get rid of the bird-watching areas all over the park and the city!” The mask outline appears over Monsieur Pigeon’s eyes, “ _Enough of your lies_! An eye for an eye, Mayor Bourgeois. You shitted all over the city for years with all your crooked ‘laws,’ this time the city will shit back on you. Pigeons, on my mark!”

  
“Monologuing...” Karma and Alya mutter with a head shake.

  
“Do something! Do something!” The mayor screams. Lady Luck, Karma, and Alya take a step _inside_ the building as Monsieur Pigeon points downward. Alya points her camera upward watching the pigeons getting ready to shit all over the building. “Why aren’t you doing anything!?”

  
“Oh we will. Don’t worry about that.”

  
 _At that smile_ , the mayor’s eyes widen as he realizes he’s still tied up and the only one on the outside of the balcony. “You fucking brats are gonna pay for this!” He screams as Lady Luck folds her arms over her chest, Karma _waves_ , and the orange-haired girl is pointing the damn phone at the sky.

  
He doesn’t exactly _see_ what happens but he sure as hell feels it. When he manages to shuffle his body upward, he catches a stream of pigeon shit right on the top of his lip. Then he feels nothing but clumps endlessly raining down upon his body.

  
Monsieur Pigeon laughs as the rain of pigeon shit descends upon him and the hotel. These so-called “heroes" are going to pay dearly for this.

  
“Alright, we’ve had our fun. Let’s up a stop to this.”

  
“Agreed. Lucky charm!” Predictably, a closed polkadotted umbrella—well an umbrella hat drops into Lady Luck’s waiting hands. She hands the umbrella hat off to Karma who takes a step outside and pops open the hat. She keeps her arms at her sides then unlatches her batons from her sides and connects them. Karma tiptoes on the balcony then extends her baton nudging the feathered cap on Monsieur Pigeon’s head. The transformation immediately breaks, the pigeons halt, and Monsieur Pigeon out of the sky with a yell.

  
“Gotta admit, didn’t think it would work. I was sure he’d notice.” Lady Luck runs up the balcony railing then swan dives off the building throwing out her yo-yo to catch the man no longer possessed _and_ she somehow has to reach his hat before it gets to someone else.

  
She manages to reach the man and the hat and yo-yos up toward the hotel. Her yo-yo string ties itself around Karma’s baton then Karma pulls the two of them up the rest of the way.

  
When she lands on the balcony, and the man lands on his face beside her – into a pile of some pigeon shit, Lady Luck rips the hat in two and a butterfly flutters out of it. “I release you from your corruption, little butterfly.” Her yo-yo turns into a net and she scoops the butterfly up then releases it. “Purification complete. _Miraculous cure_!” When she throws the yo-yo in the sky, the sky turns pink and the aura surrounds the mayor freeing his limbs. Then it restores the hat to its previous, non-corrupted look. Lastly, and the mayor makes sure of this, it cleans the hotel.

  
Chloé falls from the sky and into Lady Luck’s arms. “I— _oh_! L-Lady Luck!” She squeals. “I never got to thank you for the other day... and, uh, right now.”

  
“You’re welcome.”

  
The blonde _giggles_ then twirls the end of her ponytail. Lady Luck carefully sets her down on the floor and the blonde bats her eyelashes before kissing Lady Luck on the cheek, “thank you, Lady Luc—”  
  


“Thank you? _Thank you_?! You didn’t see what they let that _monster_ do to my precious hotel!”

  
The pigeon man flinches as Karma helps him to his feet. “Did you _not_ see me falling from the sky!? Lady Luck caught me before I hit the pavement!”

  
“She let the pigeon man have his pigeons shit all over the hotel!”

  
Chloé points a finger at her father’s face, “that law you made is utterly ridiculous, papa! I can’t go watch the cute birds playing in their bird pond because the park removed the fountain! Fix it immediately.”

  
“B-But _Chloé_ —”  
  


“Do it _now_!” The man flinches. “And apologize to the creepy bird guy! He helped me with a stalker I had in the park.”

  
“W-What? He... He did?”

  
Chloé rolls her eyes, “uh, yeah. Don’t you remember me telling you yesterday?” The blonde rolls her eyes, “whatever. Apologize, papa.” The man twitches as his daughter glowers at him.

  
“R-Right.” He gulps, “I-I’m sorry, M. Ramier. I give you my word I will immediately revoke the laws against bird feeding.”

  
“And we’ll check on him to make sure.” Lady Luck adds and the mayor flinches again.

  
“I see this as an absolute win-win scenario.” Karma gives two thumbs up.

  
“C’mon Mlle. Recorder, we’ll give you a lift home.”

  
“Yes please.” Alya whispers walking over to Lady Luck.

  
"You too, M. Bird Guy? What’s your name?”  
  


“M-Me? I-I’m Xavier. Xavier Ramier.”

  
“Then c’mon down, M. Ramier. We’re leaving.”

  
Chloé snaps her finger in disappointment when she recognizes she can’t get a lift home (i.e. get carried by Lady Luck, again) because she’s not only already home but Lady Luck doesn’t have enough hands or yo-yo strings to carry more than one person and herself.

  
🐤

  
Alya had Lady Luck and Karma drop her off at the art supply store rather than home because if she went home immediately, she’d probably not leave. The very second she got home she chucked her shoes off then sprinted to her computer and downloaded everything onto a flashdrive to keep forever. Because she got to swing around the city with Lady Luck. That video she made is for her eyes only.

  
After making sure it was on her flashdrive (she took it out twice then put it back in to make sure), she sent the videos to Max or maybe Markov for uploading. She’ll have to look into posting live to the luckyblog. Maybe she’ll ask Max about that in school tomorrow.

  
Alya screams, clutching her phone against her chest, when the luckyblog alerts her of a new set of videos.

  
“What’s with the—oh it’s your phone.” With a scoff, Nora walks in then walks right back out the opened bedroom door.

  
She jumps up then sits on her computer chair seeing the videos Max labeled “for the birds.” Hmmm. “Maybe I’ll have to look into the mayor some. Wonder what other crooked laws he’s passed that the city is unaware of?” On her phone, Alya makes a note to look up the mayor. Ever since yesterday, Chloé’s been extra nice to her. Not that Chloé even acknowledged her before Alya hugged her during her breakdown. The blonde still seems like a mega brat, not gonna lie, but she isn’t completely terrible. And she was damn near in full-on love with Lady Luck. Not that Alya blames her. Alya’s halfway in love with Lady Luck herself. Those biceps alone? Alya fans herself off.

  
Swinging past the hotel, Alya noticed not all of the pigeon shit was cleared during the Miraculous Cure and she suspects the mayor will find out... eventually.


End file.
